Church.

Curtis Mayfield: Pusherman (1972)

.

I went out today and walked 10 miles, mostly in the rain, and it was definitely less effort than the last couple of times I’ve been out, I think my muscles are waking up. I did a bit of thinking about the Honcho and how I am going to get my emotional needs met without him there, not that he was doing a great job of meeting them. I don’t know, I am a bit foxed. Judging by the way I manage my relationships, I don’t want real closeness, what I want is regular shots in the arm of heart-stopping, paralysis-inducing desire and romantic love. Preferably from a safe distance, in the context of a relationship that’s not going anywhere. I don’t know if that’s the sort of thing you can advertise for on the internet. Maybe you can. Maybe I underestimate the dating public. Asking for what I want in a direct and clear way has reliably yielded good results up to now. I might try it and see what happens. You never know.

1 Health point.

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