My body is not a temple, it is a theme park. At the moment, it is a particularly unpleasant park with a horror theme. I am writing this post standing up. I cannot sit down, and not for the fun kind of reasons. It is because the totally-without-precedent excruciating back pain that appeared and, just as inexplicably, disappeared, in April, has suddenly returned. I can’t even begin to tell you how inconvenient this is. A person who has what is essentially a desk job at some point needs to be able to sit down.
I am totally willing to believe that this is psychosomatic, the violent shooting pains in my lower back and right leg are doing a really top-notch job of relieving and masking whatever mental agony I was experiencing yesterday. I have taken a load of aspirin and it is not doing anything. Now I really do have to go and see a doctor. Better go tomorrow. FFS. I feel like an old car that is falling apart.
Speaking of fun reasons why you might not be able to sit down, the highlight of my day so far has been a phone call with a company that was trying to sell me business development services. The guy had just described to me how he would target key decision-makers at large organisations on our behalf, phone them and set up meetings for us to attend. He said “Then we will be able to get you in a room for an hour for a real-life physical meeting with the Head Honcho.”
Handily, we were on the phone, so he couldn’t see me double over with suppressed laughter. I should be so lucky. Nil points.