Right, today is the day I admit it.
Thanks to several months of recent events, the major one being Crime in April, I am depressed. I am actually clinically depressed, with all its associated side-effects such as being irrational and short-tempered and leaning excessively hard on inadequate or dysfunctional relationships. Today is the day that I didn’t successfully sweep it under the carpet. What I did sweep under the carpet, or more accurately, just drop on the floor, is my hair, which is falling out.
The thing is, the moment one admits to oneself that there is significant mental pain, it immediately gets worse. Obviously, the major advantage of Denial and Sweeping It Under The Carpet is that it is an anaesthetic. It’s not 100% successful but it’s good enough that you can still do your job, enjoy travel, take pleasure in photography, etc. The minute you let the anaesthetic wear off, you are in trouble.
Now what? I don’t know. I really do not relish the thought of anti-depressants and I do not have a particularly high opinion of psychotherapy, so I don’t know where that leaves us. I am thinking that I am going to have to get myself out of this situation using massive amounts of exercise and a focus on nutritious, healthy eating.
Dear Lord Satan. TLYW is really hard right now, this might be the hardest period since I started it.
Readers, your opinions and advice are welcome. Be my guest. Let’s have some good old-fashioned internet armchair psychology, like Grandma used to make. In the meantime, I need to do some more work, because people are waiting for stuff from me, and I am struggling.