What do nuns even do on a Saturday night, anyway.

It’s rubbish. I love my gym in every respect except that it closes early on the weekend. (Why?!! This is typical of Britain, if I were in LA the gym would be open 24/7. I should start my own gym. Bloody hell. That’s actually not a bad idea.)

Anyway, I had a productive visit. I put on extra careful make-up and quite surprised myself with the results, apparently I really know some things about eye make-up. Then put on a flattering bra and my most fashionable tracksuit bottoms and went to the gym. Saw Delroy, who was wearing an unfortunate jumper, not that I should complain, having greeted him yesterday in a vest that is 10 years old and too small for me.

Did a full session of weight training, about 50 minutes. I will be aching all over tomorrow, not having lifted any weights for six weeks or more. Then went to the pool and swam forty lengths, I notice that I am gradually getting faster at swimming so it didn’t even take all that long. There was no eye candy in the jacuzzi so I went and got dressed and was all done by 8.45.

At that point I was annoyed to find that they’d already closed the restaurant and bar, even though the ‘facilities’ (obviously not including the restaurant, because who could want that) don’t close until 9.30 and the actual building doesn’t close until 10pm. So it was basically all over by 8.45. And now I am home, it’s 9.30 on a Saturday, I look particularly alluring this evening and there is no-one around to admire me. And anyway we are only on Day 4 of The Hills Are Alive and that means I’ve got about 66 more days of living like a nun ahead of me. Nine more Saturday nights. It’s so shit. I am thinking of finding someone to have an online romance with to keep me going for a while.

What can you do. Enjoy Health, I suppose. This marathon of self-imposed exile from real-life dating ought to concentrate my attention on fitness most wonderfully so if I just knuckle down now and pretend that I’m a professional athlete then I stand a decent chance of looking like one by the time we get to mid-March, and that’s not going to do me any harm in the larger game of looking for love.

I have started using White Strips on my teeth.

2 Health points.


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