Month: June 2013

Staying Hot

Finally, some summer involving sunshine has arrived in London. And it is like a miracle: sun comes out, appetite for carbohydrates or really any food disappears. I am starting to think that I should go and live in a hot country. I think the reason I’m hungry all the time and a bit prone to chest infections is because I live in a place that is cold and damp, not to mention heavy on the pollution. I think I should quit Chinese, learn Arabic and go and live in North Africa or the Middle East.

Now for a tune, like we always do about this time. You’ve really got to hear this, I was sauntering around my manor earlier with this on the headphones. It is The Bee Gees, mashed up with Nelly. Oh yeah. You know you want it.

Somebody help me! I’m gonna take my clothes off!

Bee Gees vs Nelly: Staying Hot


Chinese, back on track.

Yay! I did some Chinese, mainly because I needed to score a point and it was an easy option. More details on the Hanyu blog.

In other news, I’ve heard from Pedro and there is talk of a date this weekend, which would be our 6th date. I am not sure why I am counting. Maybe I am cautious of being too optimistic because of Marcel unexpectedly flaking after 4 months of relative happiness. Anyway. He is a 宅男 and I am a 女神 and I don’t have a word for what Pedro is but he seems cool.


My internet access went down this evening. I did so much housework! I cleaned behind shelving cabinets, did some heavy dusting and floor mopping, organised all my knitting projects and knitting magazines so they are tidily stashed away in decorative boxes rather than lying around all over the floor in nasty-looking supermarket shopping bags, and I even did some de-cluttering and gave Little G some things to take to the charity shop.

Obviously there is more to do. That’s the thing with cleaning. If you clean and organise one part of the house, it makes everything else look shit. Also decluttering can lead to piles of things appearing on your bedroom floor, waiting to be put away. Anyway. Tomorrow is another day.

I am so impressed with myself! 1 Home point. I need to start  collecting points seriously again now, if I can’t manage one point a day then I’m not even trying.

Frazier Chorus: Dream Kitchen

Knit 6 more rows in st st, then cast off.

Okay, I think I have it out of my system now. I think I’m finally starting to get tired of knitting and to wish that I was doing something else, like maybe having a life, occasionally going outdoors and earning some points and stuff.

Readers, I have no doubt that to many of you knitting is just about the most laughably boring subject you can think of. It is why I don’t discuss it in any detail here. All you need to know for the purposes of this blog is that the physical action of twisting yarn around sticks so as to produce miles of fabric and ultimately, new clothes, is more powerfully addictive than crack. Most knitters, whether their everyday knitting habit is modest or ferocious, will periodically experience episodes where the compulsion to knit outranks all other activities.

I entered one of these phases I think around the end of February, so four months ago. I started knitting a quite complicated stole in fine yarn, one that would have required many, many hours of work to complete even if there had been no other project competing for my attention. After a while I started to find it frustrating so, in the grip of my break with reality, I thought the right thing to do would be to knit a sweater. Then some socks. Then some mittens. Then start a shawl. Then knit three more sweaters. I just finished the fourth sweater last night and I think I’m finally ready to put the needles down and do something else. In 16 weeks, I’ve produced an amount of knitting that would more usually take me 12-15 months.

I’ve gained approximately two pounds in weight for each of the four sweaters I’ve made and I am now too fat to wear them attractively, which I guess is Nature’s way of correcting itself, lol. I’m fat and I’m tired of knitting. It’s time to go outdoors and get some exercise and slim down to my correct size so that I can wear all these new clothes that I’m 8 lbs too heavy for.

I’m not going to post photos of my own knitting because pieces of knitted fabric that are fresh off the needles are usually crumpled, in need of a wash and generally look awful and as such will do nothing to persuade you that I’m not wasting my time. Instead, let me show you what it is that stimulates my knitting appetite so badly. If you can knit, you can make these items, the patterns are by Louisa Harding and support her Mila yarn. She is a British designer but is distributed internationally by Designer Yarns. I’ve liked Louisa Harding for a long time but this collection has particularly won my heart because (a) juicy colours!, (b) simple designs with a little twist, so fun while being easy to knit, (c) the yarn is comfortable to work with, doesn’t split, knits up fast.

mila designs

And now, church. A righteous tune for a Sunday. F.T.P. means Free The Prisoners.

Baby J ft. Skinnyman: None Of Them

Sleeping Over

Ah, summer has arrived in London. It is no longer freezing cold and raining with a grey sky. Now it is clammy and humid while raining, with a grey sky.

I had a fifth date with Mr Environmentalist, aka Pedro. We went to see a film that I won’t review here in case he finds the blog. Then we went back to his house and I stayed over which was a mistake really because we both snore and kept each other awake all night. I knew that was a bad move. My top tip for having sex with people who you are dating: set aside time to have sex. It is a date in its own right. Do not tack it on to the end of another date by which time it’s late, you’re both tired and both could do with some quality sleep before work.

Anyway. Despite that small tactical error, we are still getting on well.

I find him very emotionally expressive and romantically demonstrative, a lot more than I am used to. He seems like he wants romance. I wonder why he picked me and why he hasn’t found what he’s looking for already. So I asked him some questions about it.

On the subject of monogamy (he is a long-established monogamist while I object to it on principle), he explained that women who he’s met previously from the dating website helped bring the relationship to an end by demanding a monogamous commitment too soon, before they’d had a chance to develop any feelings for each other. I thought that was interesting. I’m not sure it completely answered the question but it partly answered it so OK. Then I said ‘what are you going to do next time I go on holiday? You will be jealous’ and he said ‘no, I won’t’.

Then I asked him what he is looking for, a conversation that went like this:

Gloria: What are you looking for, Pedro? Do you want to be in love?

Pedro: Of course. I want that every day.

! I am not used to this kind of talk. As you know, readers, I am no stranger to the joys of falling in love, but still. JC would have cut his own throat before saying something like that.

Let’s have some UK garage. Let’s have some Mark the Ruff Ryder. Love his London accent and his dirty London sounds.

Once upon a time I walk in my manor. Come across a bad boy selecta.

Mark Ruff Ryder: Joy

Slim Fast(er)

I am living on plates of vegetables and Slim-Fast. It sucks but at least I don’t have to think too hard about what to eat. Yesterday for lunch I ate two corn cobs and two whole bunches of asparagus tips.

Look at dis! Green peas in a de fridge! Mushrooms in a de room! Broad beans on a de scene!

Clint Eastwood & General Saint: True Vegetarian (1983)


I feel I should apologise to all the tourists who are in London right now, who came here on holiday on the understanding that June is summer. It is dark and it is pouring with rain. It makes me want to be somewhere with sun. Abdul has a new photo up and he looks delicious and so does the beach. I love his face and his body language, he’s full of attitude. He’s really intelligent and political, but he’s also quite aware of his own beauty, with the result that he looks great in photos. We are chatting a little bit. Nothing too heavy. I don’t think we are quite finished with each other. I feel like I just need about two or three weeks with him, actually, that would be enough. Just enough time for us to say all the things to each other that need saying.

In other news, I am seriously, calorie-counting, Proper Dieting as of today. My fridge is stuffed with fresh vegetables. Oh yes, and I bought digital scales at last. They did not immediately knock five pounds off me but at least I believe what they are saying. There’s a fifth date with Mr Environmentalist coming up so there’s every reason now to get back in shape.

Let’s have a tune. Let’s have some Wu-Tang.

Wu-Tang Clan: Gravel Pit (2000)