Summer of Love #4: Mr Environmentalist

Ooh, readers. He was a bit special. We had chemistry. He is early thirties, slim, nice looking. Portuguese. Nice accent. Well-read. Likes social science, esp anthropology. Was interesting. Was so sweet and considerate and concerned that I should think well of him. Oh, and he has a nice job where he tries to restore nature instead of destroying everything with capitalism.

We had such a lovely time. We have got it all worked out, everything, the whole relationship. We have planned what kind of sex we are going to have and what we are doing about contraception, we have decided what each of us is getting the other for their birthday (mine in August, his in September) and we agreed to go on holiday together and have already picked out a destination. And we kissed and stuff. But mainly we talked and smiled at each other.

We are seeing each other again this weekend. I am excited. It will have to fit in around the 17 other dates that I’ve got lined up.

Squee! Seems like the blue eyeliner paid off.

Beauty Trends: blue eyeliner

I am totes going out this evening in blue eyeliner because beauty trends. Also, the consequences of not ever changing your make-up are known to be dire. You know how Kate Middleton always wears too much black eyeliner, making her look older than her mom, Carole. That is what we want to avoid. So. Blue eyeliner. It’s a summer trend. It is a scary thing to put on brand new make up, esp right before a date but it’s too late to take it all off now.

My tips for wearing blue eyeliner:

- you need a nude eye. By nude, I obviously don’t mean no make-up. I mean you have spent 15 minutes applying primer and concealer so that your eyes appear to be the same colour all over, that being the same colour as the rest of your face.

- lay on that blue eyeliner – top lid only – and don’t hold back.

- wear as little mascara as you can stand, you are trying to make yourself look younger, not older, so restrain yourself. Light blusher or bronzer or whatever you usually wear and nude lips.

I’ve just checked it out in my favourite mirror in the bathroom, where the light is good, and it is a very fresh, youthful look and nice for summer. Quite deceptive, really. The bright blue eyeliner acts to distract attention away from all the preparatory work that went on with the primer and concealer.

Jessica Alba in Glamour magazine:

Summer of Love #3: Mr Gorgeous 29-year-old Model.

Oh, so pretty. So nice to sit across the dinner table looking at such a pretty face. Such a sweet boy. Old enough to say interesting and clever things. Young enough to still be wearing the face of an angel.

Will we see each other, again, I don’t know. I did not feel waves of scorching passion coming off him, but there was a warm, steady current of Like that could probably be converted into Strongly Like if we were to spend any time alone together. So we’ll see. We’re both busy now for a couple of weeks (because he has got important MODELLING to do, yo) so I said I would text him then and see what’s happening.

Is this going to be my big summer romance? Probably not. But it could possibly become a little something something if we don’t rush it and if the sun shines on it just right.

Jah Roots: Good Highs (2006)

 

Summer of Love #2: Mr Nice

Sigh. He was a thoroughly nice guy. English gent. Nice. Pleasant. A good chap. Decent. Nice manners. Well-travelled. We had a nice chat over drinks and dinner and it was all too obvious that we are not a good match. He’s sweet but I’m a much stronger personality and have very strong views about things. It just was not happening. If there’s one thing I cannot be in this life, it is the wife of an Englishman. I can do better than that, I know it and they know it.

On the way home I texted Abdul in Egypt. I told him to call off his engagement to his nice Muslim fiancee. I told him I will come back to Egypt, buy a flat there and I will help him start a business. I signed it #atheisthomewrecker.

Summer of Love #1: Mr Inappropriately Romantic

Points in favour:

• Not bad looking.
• Professional, good career. Has his own flat in a nice part of London.
• Spanish, so sexy accent.

Points against:

• OMG stop already. Please. We just met. Don’t hold my hand across the dinner table, attempt to stroke my face, make endless, gushing compliments, kiss me when I’ve showed absolutely no sign of wanting to you to do that, ‘help’ me with my scarf in a way that I don’t need or gaze into my eyes like this is the first date you’ve ever been on in your whole life. I am going to take your word for it that you have actually dated real human women in the past but you should recognise that that is an act of faith on my part because the way you are acting is way over the top, so far over the top it is a bit ridiculous.
• Further to the above, dude, if I have to tell you FIVE TIMES in one date to dial back the romance, for fucks sake will you please listen because I’m not saying it for a joke.

At least he paid for dinner. Overall, that date was kind of annoying. He seemed nice in many ways, is not bad looking, intelligent enough, we could go to a concert or something together, I would give him a second date and another chance but all of the above made everything such hard work, after two hours together I was exhausted.

Meh. We’ll see what tomorrow brings.

Summer of Love

Yes, it’s time for one of our seasonal specials. As you know, the Twelve Dates of Xmas worked out well, insofar as I was in a new relationship with Marcel by New Year and that was a happy enough arrangement for four months, so I am ready to give systematic dating another try.

I now have active profiles on two dating sites. A youthful site where I say a lot about myself and a more conservative one where I say much less and have less sexy photos. To my surprise, they are yielding similar results in terms of leads. The profile on the younger site gets looked at a lot more but the number of attractive, bright people who are interested in arranging a date with me is similar from one site to the next.

Since I now have rather a full diary for the coming week, then, and as I really cannot allow myself to pine for Abdul, who I have left behind in Egypt, let’s declare it a new dating season and make the most of what London has to offer. Here goes.

I suppose we’d better have an objective or plan, hadn’t we. The Xmas project involved meeting the first 12 interesting people to message me on the dating website, to see what happened. This time, let’s have a more qualitative goal. It’s the end of May now. I’d like to be in love with someone who lives near me and is actually available for a relationship by the end of September.

I’ll keep a tally and publish regular date reports and probably graphs and things like that as well. Wish me luck!

The Bangles: Walk Like An Egyptian

Egypt, part 4: Ras Mohammed

Now I can show you some decent photographs of why you would want to go snorkelling in Egypt, although I don’t have any underwater coral shots for you. Little G and I went on a boat cruise around Ras Mohammed which is a national park and has very beautiful coastline, clear blue sea and a lot of snorkelling opportunities. Snorkelling is great fun but not very dignified to look at, which is quite funny. So here is how it all looks from the boat.

Look at that blue sea. Wow.

Everyone gets their snorkelling gear on. People had wildly different levels of skill, not that I am in a position to mock. See the group leader in the black wetsuit? His beauty even outshone the coast and the coral reefs. If any model agents are reading this blog, you need to go to Naama Bay Jetty and take a look at him without further ado.

In the water. Snorkelling is amazing, I hadn’t tried it before this trip. I’m not the world’s strongest swimmer, watching this group splashing around and bumping into each other made me feel so lucky that I had a private snorkelling lesson the day before, the sweet luxury of private moments with someone who’s holding your hand.

It was just unbelievably lovely. I still haven’t seen the pyramids. I want to go back.

And that’s all the news.